Am I going to regret working during this time in her life later on? I tell myself that she won't even remember any of these moments; I don't remember anything before I was three and she probably won't either. I just find myself wondering if this is the best thing for all of us to be doing at this point in life. I don't know how a mom can stay home with a hubby still in school though, how do they get benefits like medical/dental insurance? and do they live on student loans or what?
I think a little part of this impromptu pity-party of mine is that Ary now realizes when I leave. The other day when I handed her over to Jed's mom she got some separation anxiety and it just about made me cry too to walk out the door. I posted last time about how I enjoy my job in ortho AND my job as a mother, which I really do, I just don't want to regret anything during this short time in my little girl's life.
I guess really I'm looking for a little advice or experience, either of how you make it work to be home with your babies when they are little or how you go to work without feeling like your missing out while someone else raises your child. ??
6 comments:
Oh Callee.. This post breaks my heart. I have trouble leaving my babies ever, It would be so hard to have to leave to work everyday!
I do know however that the government has a lot of programs to help students, and you shouldn't be ashamed to take advantage of them. that's what they are there for. And as soon as you graduate you pay it back ten fold in taxes. Without your income I'm sure you would qualify for many of them.
I do know that Ary won't remember being left with grandma but you will. And if you are already feeling that you have regrets leaving her there are other options! We have had the same struggles. But to me it was well worth it to sacrifice many earthly extra's to be raising my babies. There are also lots of things you can do from home to make a little extra money! I would love to talk to you more! Call me if you want to- I cant send you my number on facebook. Just let me know. GOOD LUCK!!!
I hate going back to work, it is so sad! She is so cute and getting so big!
Cal my love...I have no advice for you, but can I come over and have a pity-party with you? I can however deeply sympathize with what you are dealing with. I had 3 GLORIOUS days this past weekend with my little man and when I had to go back to work today it felt like the first time going back after maternity leave - awful! I know it is hard, and it is a personal decision that you and Jed should make together that is best for all of you. Good luck, I will keep you in my prayers! You are a good Mama no matter what your choice is though, that little girl sure loves ya!
Awww, I wouldn't want to leave an adorable face like that either! She is a DOLL, Calee. She looks so much like you! I don't have any good advice since I've never gone through this. But my mom always says that while she and my dad were in school, they put their family and the gospel first, and "things always seemed to work out" money-wise. She was lucky and was able to work from home managing apartments and doing day-care. It is not easy! I would have a hard time leaving my little one. If it makes you feel better, you can think of the NYC moms who just get a nanny and go back to work after three months maternity leave, and are totally uninvolved in their kids lives from then on out. You are WAY better than that! You want to be a part of Ary's life! See what an amazing mom you are?!?! ;)
I've heard a lot about government grants, my friend, whose hubby is in medical school, has two kids, and she says because of their kids the government takes good care of them. They have special provisions for families.
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